1. Remember that, in order to embrace new ideas or strategies, you must first let go of old ones. You can't decide to lose weight and still believe that you don't have to exercise to do it. You can't move in new social circles while continuing to spend your time hanging out with old ones. You get the idea.

2. Give yourself a break every now and then. It's not like you intentionally go out and plan on screwing things up, right? You deserve to feel good about yourself. The world is tough enough as is. Don't beat it to the punch, so to speak.

3. Perspective is a wonderful tonic for everyday stress. When dealing with others, keep in mind that things are seldom as great nor as terrible as they seem at first glance. Interpersonally, we are neither as memorable nor as inconspicuous as we believe ourselves to be. It's that grey area that soothes-it leaves wiggle room either way, and avoids the dramatic emotional experience that accompanies either end of the spectrum.

4. Learn to say no-to others, to projects, to tasks that are not a high priority in your everyday life. Most people can improve at this, myself included. If we understand that energy is a limited resource, we can then manage it fiercely.

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I was recently headed to a meeting with a coach, whom I had never met with face-to-face, and I was excited about the initial discussion. It so happened that, as I was walking into the building to head to the coach's office, I saw her walking from the opposite direction. "Hello, and good morning, I'm Dr Leif Smith" I bellowed, making sure that she would be able to hear me, and I extended my hand for the initial greeting. "Hello, Dr. Leif," she replied. She then kept talking as she moved ahead. "I'm talking to Dr Leif," she remarked. "Yes, that's me" I replied, somewhat confused at the awkwardness of our greeting. I walked beside her as we continued our discussion. "Yes, I'm talking to Dr. Leif. Can I call you back?" she said, and I realized that I had missed the glowing blue object jutting out from her right ear, which was on my far side…

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Do you ever catch yourself looking back on your life, to times when life was “better,” “easier,” or “less complicated?” If you’re anything like me, you do. Somehow, it seems that life was always a bit easier. Logically, however, we know that isn’t true. Logically:

• we knew less (about life, love, relationships, science, etc) -we had less (material possessions, money) -we appreciated less (our health, our friends, family, etc)

Our minds seem to remember things in a kinder, more pleasant light when we reminisce. By contrast, then, our current state appears in a less favorable light. This is because:

• we know more (perhaps too much)
• we have more (to lose)
• we understand (people move on, friends and family pass on, life isn’t fair, etc)

We need to learn to balance the past with our present. There’s nothing wrong with knowing what got you here, though we can become immobilized when we insist on living in a time that exists only in memory. In my work, I’ve found far too many issues related to an ability to move ahead and live life as it is now, not as it was then.

We need to move on-beyond the glory days, away from the shame and guilt, away from our skeletons and demons, far past our regrets and mistakes. Only then can we make proper peace with the past, and focus appropriate energy on creating new memories, new friendships, and new dreams.

Just like those Nationwide Insurance commercials attest, life comes at us fast. Spend more time looking at what’s in front and ahead of you, and you’ll find yourself far better adjusted than most. You don’t have to apologize for who you were. Just move ahead, and try to be a little bit better, a little bit smarter, and a little bit lighter (with regards to emotional baggage) on your feet.

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